Premarital Sex

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         Premarital sex is an issue that has been contradicted repeatedly by various kinds of people.  However, whether someone has sex before marriage or not, they should feel free and unjudged when they decide to have sex, and not feel the need to follow a specific guideline as to when they can part take in sex.  The ethical systems that can be used to for this topic is Ethical egoism, arguing for the morality of premarital sex, Natural Law, arguing for the immorality of premarital sex, and analyzing the church’s point of view on the issue.  Through observing each ethical system, it can be clearly seen that this is, a controversial topic and that premarital sex should be considered moral, especially when considering the changing world.

        Ethical Egoism is the ethical system where the actions are good if its consequences are favorable to the majority, in this case the agent and their partner.  The change of the human body and society is an important consideration because they have changed throughout the centuries.  Many centuries ago the wait to have sex with your wife was not that long.  People would marry at younger ages therefore reducing the time of temptation.  However now a day in the U.S. the average age for women to marry is 27 and for men 29.  In the 1800s the onset of puberty was around 16-17 for girls and around 18 for boys with their sexual maturity not coming into play for another five years.  Now a day’s sexual maturity begins earlier than it did a century ago.  The average age that boys begin to hit puberty in the United States is twelve.  The average age in the United States for female is around twelve or thirteen.  The change to earlier ages comes from the improvements in nutrition, health, living conditions, and various other factors.^[1]  In America, 95% of the people will have premarital sex.  Therefore, by considering premarital sex as moral it benefits the majority and allows them to feel no shame in their actions.  There are also many benefits behind premarital sex.  According to Jill Filipovic, when couples have sex once a week instead of once a month, their level of happiness is equivalent to an extra $50,000 a year.^[2]   In addition, people with an active sex life live longer.  This is due to its ability to release stress, boost their immunity, and helps your sleep and your heart. 

Continuing with the Ethical Egoism standpoint, one should consider that society plays a role in how premarital sex is seen.  Through the advertisements, television shows, and social media, sex is presented as dirty and shameful.  However, that is not the reality of the actions.  Sex should be an intimate way that two people show their love for each other.  If the couple later finds out that they are incompatible within this situation, that marriage can result in unhappy marriages. Miserable marriages due to incompatibility are common.  Whether there’s a ring on the finger or not, it is not a shameful or immoral act, it is something meaningful and intimate.  Due to the poor advertisement of sex, it makes it harder for couples to feel comfortable about discussing their sexual needs before marriage.  It is just as important as discussing their religious values, how many kids they want, where they want to live, etc.^[3]   Furthermore, the choice of saving oneself for marriage is a decision they must make themselves and be respected for it.  A person should not be judged or considered immoral or shameful if they choose to have sex before marriage.  The individual and their partner must decide if it is a good action for both as individuals.    

        The ethical system of the Natural law is relevant when looking at the immoral side of premarital sex.  Egoism is an action that is good if it is done per the will of God.  Analyzing this view from a Christian standpoint there are various things to consider.  Such as, if one waits until marriage to have sex, it allows both partners to get to know each other better.  By doing this, the couple develops an emotional understanding and intimacy of each other.^[4]  Through making the effort to personally understand about your partner, the couple becomes extremely close to a point where they can tell what the other is thinking because they are emotionally compatible.   The understanding of each other is extremely important to solve any issues that may occur and to have a healthy marriage.

        By following Egoism standpoint, the couple will receive God`s blessing upon the act of their sexual love, or marital love.  Love in the physical expression in marriage, is recognized as sacred and a sign of the husband and wife`s covenant of love that they share and the love they share in union with God.  One of the many purposes of the couple’s marriage vows reflects the faithful, the permanent, the exclusive, and the self-giving love they now promise to each other and to God.^[5]  If a couple does not follow this they will not receive this blessing from God.  The vows they exchange on their wedding day will not play into their entire purpose.  

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