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Getting Married

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"Getting Married"

The past three years have been really hard on me. I moved to Columbia when I was in the 10th grade and, I had to totally start over with friends and a new school. My life was simple and I thought I didn't have to worry about anything. I began to see my mom spending a lot of her time with the same guy, and every chance she got she would go see him. I then realized this was much more then a "boyfriend" and that this could lead to a more personal connection. Because of this new relationship developing I began to discover that this could lead to a change in my life. A change that I would never forget and that it would hurt me emotionally for a long time. The very moment my mom told me she was getting married, I realized that she would be leaving town and I would have to change my home.

My dad left my mom five years ago for another women. The break-up was hard for everyone, but it wasn't a surprise. Even though he did this horrible thing, he still continued to be in the lives of my brother and I. My mom felt very abandoned; she loved being in a marriage and her religious beliefs were very important to her; like not getting a divorce, or trying to work everything out no matter what. My parents had been married for thirteen years and they had always loved each other, but things were never equal in the marriage. My mom was always doing more than my dad, and I think that was the biggest problem in my parents' relationship. My mom did the cooking, the cleaning, and taking care of the children, all while holding a full time job and going back to school. After the divorce, my mom decided to change her lifestyle, so we sold our house in Sumter to find a new start. Columbia offered a new start, new opportunities and a better environment, so my mom took it. I hated moving to Columbia. I became very stubborn; stopped playing soccer, a sport I knew that would take me somewhere in the future, I totally became secluded to myself and I never talked to anyone. The only person who I could trust and I knew would never let me down was my boyfriend, Oliver. He was there for every up and down I had and was and still is very supportive.

After two years of living in Columbia, I was finally getting used to things being very simple. I went straight to school, came straight home, and then went straight to work. This was my whole routine for 2 years; I grew very shy and just stayed to myself. My mom and I weren't as close as we had been when I lived in Sumter, but we started talking more and more as I started coming out of my shell. Things were actually starting to get a little better, I began to talk to more people and explore new things. I started hanging out with friends, and I began to open up a little more with family. I didn't always stay in my room all day and I went outside more. Then one day my mom told me she was getting married. At this time, usually children would be excited for their lonely parents to meet a wonderful person and get married, but I wasn't.

I had just gotten home from a great weekend in Sumter with my boyfriend. I walked into my house and my brother and my mom were sitting on the couch, like they usually do when we are having a "family talk". Typically our talks were about what was on our minds with something going on in the family, or if my brother and I were in trouble, like if we didn't do our choirs or something. My mom asked me to come sit down on the couch and she proceeded to go into this long explanation of how it feels to be in love after five years of not being married. At that point I looked down on my mom's hand to see if anything was there that would explain all of her details. At that very moment, I realized my mom was getting married. She had a huge, gorgeous, three stone cut diamond engagement ring on her ring finger. I was more upset at that point then I had ever been in my life. I knew changes were about to take place that no one could do anything about except wait everything out, but of course that wasn't going to happen.

Every Thanksgiving we usually go to visit our family friends, the Brantley's, in Georgia. We usually stay a weekend and then we leave, and look forward to next Thanksgiving, but the trip was different this time. The Brantley's introduced my mom to a man named Burt, he had just lost his wife of 20 years to cancer, and he was starting to date again. Burt is a very tall slim man, with such a couragous heart, who is very fun loving, and very active with his church and sport activities. Consequently, the Brantley's thought he was a perfect match for my mom, and decided to set a double date. My mom and Burt didn't really hit it off at first, but then I noticed my mom was frequently going down to Georgia. Next it turned out to be every other weekend, and they would switch off at each other's house. I didn't think much about it, because I figured it would never work out. They just lived to far apart and they both lead their own lives: jobs, kids,



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