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Preparing for Anal Sex

To get ready for anal sex, the first thing the receiver needs to do is relax. A hot bath or a massage beforehand is always a good idea to get prepared. The sphincter muscles around the anus won't let anything pass comfortably unless they're relaxed.

Discuss the limits, expectations and techniques of your anal experience beforehand. There's nothing worse than surprises during anal sex. Make sure you and your partner are on the same page every step of the way.

It's a good idea to have a bowel movement about an hour before anal sex, to make sure you don't run into anything you don't want to. You should also bathe the area, to remove any traces left by regular wiping. An enema is nice - and very thorough - but is not necessary for clean anal sex

Start Slowly

Because there is a very fine line between pain and pleasure during anal sex, we suggest that you begin your anal explorations very slowly and proceed at a leisurely pace that will allow to experience and appreciate each level of insertion.

It's a good idea to start with some external stimulation, either using a finger or with a little analingus. Make sure you have plenty of lubrication, as even the slightest bit of dryness can cause a very painful snag.

Begin insertion by using a finger or other small object. Proceed little by little, carefully watching the reaction of the receiver. Do everything you can to keep it pleasurable. You may find that it will take several sessions before you can even proceed to anything more than a finger.

Once you proceed to something bigger (ie., a penis, dildo or butt plug), you'll need to revisit the lubrication issue and be even more careful with the speed. The key for the receiver is to relax the anus and the sphincter - breathing outward during insertion can help quite a bit here. The more the receiver relaxes, the easier insertion is. As the giver, ease each little bit in and slowly withdraw until the receiver can handle normal sexual pumping action.

Proper Lubrication

More so than in any other form of sex, proper lubrication is essential in the enjoyment of anal sex. Every time you insert anything into the anus, from a finger to a penis, you're likely to tear tissue walls along the sides (much like you do to the inside of your mouth every time you brush your teeth). The more lubricant you use, the less damage you do each time.

Suffice to say, you can't overlubricate when it comes to anal sex.

You'll find that long lasting oil based lubricants work best for anal sex, but the drawback for oil based lubricants is that they will damage a latex based condom. Oil based lubricants last longer than water based lubricants. Since you must be very careful in regard to STDs with anal sex, you should only use oil based lubricants if you are with a mutually monogamus partner. Water based lubricants will get the job done, but you may need to reapply frequently during anal sex.

Male Prostate Stimulation

Though many men are reluctant to admit it, most find some sort of anal stimulation to be erotically stimulating. Even non-gay men report that inserting a finger or butt plug into the anus during sex causes incredible, throbbing orgasms.

To understand why, we must examine the role of the prostate in male orgasm. The prostate is the organ responsible for producing a good part of a man's ejaculate. Located inside the body, in the region between the anus and the base of the scrotum, the prostate is primarily accessible

through the anus. Inserting a finger into a man's anus up to about the second knuckle (as you are facing him), then curling the finger slightly towards yourself will give you direct contact and stimulation of most men's prostate gland.

You'll find that as a man ejaculates, the entire area around the prostate, including the anus (especially if you have your finger in it), will throb noticeably. Stimulating this area even lightly during orgasm causes a man to have uncontrollable orgasmic spasms. Often, men will experience much longer periods of orgasm and will ejaculate with far greater intensity and volume.

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