Divorce

Through the whole course I was able to make a successful group research based on the group of people in the classroom and also on my own experience. During the curse our concern focused on effective communication within the group in order to make the most appropriate decision. We identified the group as "A small number of individuals in interdependent role relations with the set of values or norms that regulate the behavior of members in matters of concern to the group" (Patton & Downs, 2003, p.2). The best quality decision we make when the group consist of three to eight people. Therefore dealing with people we must recognize the main concepts that are involved in achieving the optimal agreement as Group vs. Individual Decision Making, Group Problem Solving and Team Building, Conflict and Meetings Management.

Groups meet to solve problems and make decisions. We need to know how groups can effectively accomplish their task objectives and reach an optimal decision. First there must be people joined together as we call a group. Since we are not individual any more, we are interdependent because we all influence each other. Our behaviors have impacts on the point of view the other group members. Sometimes we may not resolve the problem but at least we may be able to express our ideas to others and be heard. By having a common goal we get together as a group and this also is a positive way of getting to know ourselves and people around us at places like work, community meetings, schools etc. Our example group in the classroom consisted of five members when we found ourselves in a Dessert Survival Situation. We were to make one simultaneous decision what 15 salvaged items to keep from the plane. We decided that voting would be the best method of making this decision. Our concern was to get the most number of the same votes to get the winning answer; nevertheless, some of the members of the group had different feelings and points of view on the subject. Voting in fact is a win-lose situation in which the problems are not discussed and the issues are not taken under personal consideration, however it is time-efficient method. Participants of a group feel most comfortable to come together to a common agreement reaching a consensus rather than voting, what I could notice in the Dessert Survival Situation.

Listening in the group is also one of the characteristic of a good communication among the members. I agree with Patton & Downs (2003) that "The members should listen to one another where an idea is given a hearing and people are not afraid of being considered foolish by suggesting even extreme ideas".

As a group we also develop "norms" (Patton & Downs, 2003, p.2) which are the informal rules that group s adopt. Gathered together we may see changes in our behaviour when represented before a group, we all need to agree on how we need to behave. By establishing those norms we enhance and confirm members identity and self-esteem, because everyone has the need to be liked , accepted and heard.Everyone needs to know the objectives of the group, understand them and accept the final decision. If the atmosphere remains positive and disscussion is held in a respectfull way everyone feels free to express their own ideas and feels comfortable.

Another function in group dynamics is a communication among the group members. Patton and Downs suggest that a major task for a person is to gain the communication within the group. Their believe in communication as the essence of the small group experience and the key to successof the group.( Patton & Downs, 2003, pp. 18-19 ). We need interpersonal communication to help us understand better what the other participants want to say in a given context and we need to speak out and hear about our goals. Depending on how words are said we say can mean very different things. The purpose of communicating is that we gain knowledge about another people, we may find out what their expectations are and also how they feel about the problem. By decision making meeting we develop a communication process where everyone is working on the main goal. Each participant has the opportunity to express his own opinion and insights to the matter. Keeping the meeting in a harmonious atmosphere makes us able to state our opinion and interact in the process of making the decision. In addition to that, it is a positive experience for everyone. We are also giving off information about ourselves through verbal and non-verbal signals. Engaging the interpersonal communication helps us to distinguish members' identity. In the group we need to clarify who plays roles related to the task we working on.

We are most likely to require a role of a facilitator in order to keep the group focused and help other members-participants interact more effectively with each other. He helps the group establish the framework of the meeting takes primary responsibility for managing the group's process and provides a safe compassionate environment so people could communicate better with each other. He becomes a model of effective behavior for group members through the way he conducts the discussion. Some of his responsibilities are to remind members about time remaining for example by saying words like "We really running out of time and need to move on to the next step", being on the same track, setting safe environment for the members to feel safe with expressing their ideas without stating his own opinion, helping the group find win-win solution, recording and pointing ideas of any individual and ensuring his contribution is heard by everyone in the group by asking for instance "Ilona, what do you think about this idea?". He should make sure that everyone's needs and concerns are heard and considered. Most of the times at work when we are gathered to discuss our concerns about the nurturing matter; I noticed that the leader of the group often omits the step where she should make sure that everyone's opinion is expressed. He carelessly forgets or skips to question if anyone has anything to add. Because we are all different people with various temperaments the crucial thing is to get people to speak out their point of view towards the problem. Everyone's opinion is supposed to be taken into account, discussed and must have an impact on the final decision. I have noticed that some members at my job were simply too unassertive to speak their views, due to a fact of being confronted with the boss. I realized that meeting in that this way of handling meeting is not appropriate when some of participants are simply to afraid and shy. I decided to brake the silence and conduct the meeting myself. I became the facilitator without asking anybody if they want me to say something about the issue. By being assertive I clearly identified the nurturing facts, which we

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